Glenn Beck, outraged at Christianity's message of Social Justice declares intention to start new Religion

On his show today, Glenn Beck announced that he was leaving Mormonism and organized religion all together upon finding out that most Christian churches and those of other religions, including Mormonism, teach Social Justice. He will be starting a new religion, based upon the teachings of Ayn Rand, W. Cleon Skousen and his books including Arguing with Idiots and Common Sense. He will also be rewriting the Book of Mormon and the Holy Bible to suit his needs, and those of his followers just as he has rewritten history and the constitution to suit his own purposes.

On his program, Mr. Beck said, “Well, let me tell you, I am very disappointed in today’s religions. I thought that the teachings of all religions, especially Christianity and Mormonism allowed me to believe whatever I wanted and read the Bible in whatever manner I decided, while declaring that your interpretation is incorrect. I was told by a religious leader that only the Pope and the leaders of denominations are allowed to interpret the Bible for themselves and everyone else. I think it is a conspiracy much like that Dan Brown discovered in The Da Vinci Code. I don’t believe in what he was saying, but I think it is obvious that something is going on, if you connect the dots. Which I have.”

Upon reading a Bible for the first time, Beck told listeners that he was shocked by the obvious communism of Jehovah, Jesus and the early church.

He stated, “This redistribution of funds advocated by Jesus is against the very Judeo-Christian principles on which this country was founded and we need to put a stop to it. Churches that believe the words of Jesus and Paul will be asking us to give money to their causes, they will feed the hungry, cloth the naked and most repulsively they will visit people in jail and heal the sick. It is almost as if they would want Health Care reform. So that message is tantamount to Communism, Nazism, Facisism, Socialism and any other ism I hear about. This must be stopped. Thank God the Judeo-Christian principles that this country was founded upon are directly opposed to the words of that dangerous book. I mean if our founders believed this book they would not have killed so many Indians and put blacks in slavery. Our founding was obviously different, thankfully. I am especially outraged at the treacherous behavior of the early church leaders in Acts 2, starting an alternative society in which people redistribute wealth. This must be stopped if any church engages in it. Because, next thing these church people will want is the government to abide by the same principles.”

Beck's diatribe continued with a declaration that he would be starting a new group in the next few days called the 9-13 Project, an update of his previous 9-12 Project. This project would advocate for a new interpretation of Scripture, fully influenced by the writings of Ayn Rand and the Judeo-Christian principles Beck understands to be the bedrock of American society. It would reinterpret the words of Jesus or throw out those that were against American principles. His plans will be unveiled at a news conference.

Rumors among his close followers include armed takeover of churches led by Pastors believing in Social Justice, because Beck realizes those leaving churches need places to go, and there are already places to meet for his message.

The 10 Most Demonic Films according to Mark Driscoll

Many of us have all read the stories, the sermon, or seen how Mark Driscoll, pastor of the mega-Seattle-church Mars Hill has declared Avatar the most demonic film of all time. Of course, it is evil on numerous fronts. Not only is it a recruitment film for Paganism that shows advancement of culture as an evil. It is also a big budget action film and everyone knows Mark, the hip dude he is, is a fan of Indie flicks… of course the perfect films are Indie Action films with lots of male bonding and blood which sound great on his home theater system, which he tells us about in hisAvatar sermon.

Anyway, we have found Mark’s list of the Ten Most Demonic Films Ever made. Here is the list, borrowed by our investigative journalist/ hacker:

1. Avatar- Blue Pagans that don’t believe in sin defeating the forces of progress and manliness. I might as well add its precursors Pocahontas, Dances With Wolves and Ferngully which had the same sickening message.
2. The Matrix Reloaded/ Revolutions- not only did they suck in comparison to the first, but these Buddhist love fests also support the ending of wars between good and evil with negotiated peace settlements. That flies in the face of Revelations and the lake of fire (and manly filmmaking).
3. Thelma and Louise- Although they get what they deserve in the end for upsetting the proper Godly order of things, they do so on their terms and not punished by God alone for their sins of not obeying their husbands. Feminism is dangerous.
4. The Mission- a sickening example of the Liberal Social Gospel of pacifism. People like Brian McLaren must have used it as a template for their feminization and wimpification of “Christianity.”
5. The Village- Another strong willed woman leaving behind the proper boundaries set up by her loving, Godly parents. She is not punished, but instead brings down the natural order
6. It’s a Wonderful Life/ Heaven Can Wait/ The Preacher’s Wife- Angel Idolatry at its most evil. The early church stoned people for this kind of thing. Now we praise it. Sickening.
7. Brokeback Mountain- Disgusting attempt to take a symbol of manliness and turn it into a recruitment film for homosexual behavior. These are weak men in need of redemption, not Oscar worthy.
8. Dogma- I loved the language and the violence, but they lost me with a black disciple and headed towards heresy with a Canadian chick playing a God that could die. I hope Kevin Smith chokes on a chicken wing.
9. Star Wars- before the sickening paganism of Avatar, we had the anti-Christian combination of Buddhism, moral ambiguity and witchcraft in Star Wars. It would be higher on the list if the protagonists were not human.
10. Say Anything- What started as a great manly tale, especially in light of the lead character’s kickboxing training ended as a feminist dream in which the male’s will is subjugated by the woman’s.

Mark list did not include kid flicks, but there was a rant against children’s films, “Of course, this list is devoid of children’s movies which can be the most insidiously evil because they hide their demonic agendas behind toys and talking animals. Needless to say All Dogs Go to Heaven (with its inclusive gospel) is the vilest, followed byRatatouille, Wall-E, any Disney film with a female in charge and Lion King.”

His list of Demonic films did not include these obvious choices. He felt he should not include them because they are based upon books. So the Demonism was there before they were turned into films. These choices are obvious: Golden Compass, the Harry Potter films, the Twilight series,The Da Vinci Code and Jurassic Park (if the dinosaurs had eaten Jeff Goldblum’s postmodern atheist scientist, the films would be redeemed).

___________________________

its satire- chill Mark disciples

Buddhism Drops Tiger Woods, proposes trade for Denzel Washington

Buddhism Drops Sponsorship Deal With Tiger Woods

Dharamsala, India- In an unprecedented show of unity, three of the major schools of Buddhism have come together to announce that their religion will no longer sponsor Tiger Woods, should he return to the PGA tour. Speaking from a hotel in Dharamsala, India, a spokesman for the Dalai Lama announced the news. According to the spokesman, the three major schools of Buddhism, including Theravada (the school Tiger Woods’ mother is affiliated with), Mahayana and Vajrayana have decided that the Dalai Lama, as the public face of all Buddhists (even though he is the head of a relatively small sect of Vajrayana Buddhists) to Americans, should deliver the statement.

The statement is as follows;

“It has come to our attention that many other organizations and groups have severed ties with Tiger Woods following his unfortunate transgressions which were made public in late November, 2009. Like Accenture, AT&T and Gatorade, Buddhism feels that Tiger Woods’ transgressions are not a reflection upon our central tenants and his public image is one that we would like to separate from, as reports indicate he is being courted by other major religions. However, please consider this a suspension. He is not a free agent and we will not let him out of his air tight contract without compensation. Our agent, Scott Boras will be available for question following this event.

While we had never considered Tiger Woods a spokesperson for Buddhism, we feel we must take this step for a number of reasons; 1) Self styled spokesman Richard Gere made us look bad during the 1993 Oscars by asking Americans to channel their energy to their TVs so China would free Tibet. After recovery from that travesty, Steven Seagal’s movie career tanked embarrassing us even more. Needless to say, American celebrities are not the best role models for international Buddhists, 2) studies indicate that Buddhist men cheat on their wives at a lower rate than Christian men, including Protestants and much less than Evangelical Protestants in Public Office, 3) Brit Hume has indicated that Buddhism does not do redemption and forgiveness as well as Christianity. It is true that we do not have Western understandings of sin, individual moral redemption and god. Therefore, if Tiger Woods needs these things, he may want to consider another religion, especially since we did not even know he was a practicing Buddhist. Sure he mediates, but if we acknowledged every single person that meditates, we would be the biggest religion in the world.

By the way, we are older than Christianity. Just sayin’.”

During the question and answer time, the spokesman indicated an interest in a possible trade with Christianity. He has asked that Brit Hume, as the official spokesman for Christianity through his work at Fox News, the only news source for Tibetan Buddhists, please call the Dalai Lama to make arrangements. Buddhists are interest in a straight up trade for Tim Tebow or a Tiger Woods and Steven Seagal for Denzel Washington trade, especially if his new Christian movie is very good.

In Praise of Brad Paisley: Subverting the Form for Impact

First of all I must declare my lack of love for contemporary country music of the Nashville variety.

Don't get this Southern Boy wrong. I do love other forms of country music: Traditional Country and Western (ala George Jones, Marty Robbins and Loretta Lynn), Outlaw Country (Waylon, Kris and Merle), Bluegrass (Allison Krauss, Ralph Stanley), Texas Country (Robert Earle Keen, Lyle Lovett), Alternative Country (see Drive-By truckers, Wilco, Ryan Adams and the Cardinals, Uncle Tupelo) and those which expand country in new directions (Cash and Lucinda). When I hear a country song, I want steel guitar, energy, ragged production, edge and twang. I love it when the wheels are about to come of. I don’t want auto-tune, faux nostalgia, obvious rhymes, maudlin sentimentality and pop beats. I guess it is because I grew up in a farm house 11 miles outside of a small Southern town before moving to a trailer 3 miles from the same town. Either that or as a music snob, I think I know authenticity.

I hold contemporary preaching with the same disdain. Don’t get me wrong; I love good story telling, humor, the prophetic tradition, brave insights and eloquence. However, like my music tastes, I run screaming from arrogance, judgment, lack of Biblical insight, shallowness, theological punditry, politics disguised as Gospel, self-help and the same old thing. My least favorite thing about country songs is that I know exactly where they are going before they get there. I hate the same thing in many sermons. If I can guess where you are going, then I don’t need you. True art keeps me guessing.

So what does this have to do with the biggest country singer of the decade not named Taylor Swift?

Brad Paisley is a guy I just started listening to… because, like any well informed city folk I allowed the mainstream media to influence me. Jody Rosen, the quintessential New York Jewish rock critic loves Paisley and stated so on Slate. So, I decided to open my mind up to something I had dismissed. I am glad I did.

You see, Brad Paisley subverts the country genre and its cliches in the same manner that someone like Tim Keller subverts reformed preaching. Paisley is not an edgy preacher, like Rob Bell or Mark Driscoll. He is like Rick Warren if Rick were subversive in his message. Paisley wears the uniform of country music like a pair of weathered cowboy boots. He sings of trucks, alcohol, nostalgia, religion and sexual relations like any topical country singer/ preacher. He wears the cowboy hat, plays the guitar and has the same drawl of any number of hatted singers. In fact, he can be as trite, predictable, smatlzy and musically pedestrian as your typical country musician. But within that similar style, something special happens.

He turns the conventional country subject matter on its head, praising the election of President Obama, the future of humanity (as opposed to the "remember the good ole' days" shtick of most country music in which someone name calls a bunch of things from the 50s that nobody under 70 remembers), multiculturalism and empowering women in ways that would make the Dixie Chicks proud. Sure, he is not doing it in a way that would make a Liberal feminist from Greenwich proud, but these ideas seem to be very Blue State in a red state genre. But since he is seemingly conventional, he gets away with it. He gives people want they want and sneaks in a twist they can hear if they are listening (kinda like the parables of a guy I follow). In fact, he reminds me of the Christian writer Philip Yancy in this regard. Yancy would write for Christianity Today and bestsellers on subjects like non-Christians that saved his faith, anti-consumerism, pain and suffering with depth that would make any mainline theologian proud, but he communicated it in a manner that seemed safe (until you subtly started to agree with him). And I cannot believe Yancy can get away with some of the things he says in his books.

I think there are 3 kinds of preachers out there. The ones that beat you up, that do nothing, or the ones that tweak you. Guess which kind of preaching I like?

Paisley and Yancy, like the brilliant preachers, are the guys that wrap an arm around you, make you very comfortable and then kick you in the butt with a new idea or a hard truth (whispering it in your ear is another metaphor). Next thing you notice, you are agreeing with an idea you had previously missed. This is unlike most seeker preachers who wrap their arms around you, make you laugh and never get around to telling you anything controversial, or the Neo-orthodox young edgy preacher that walks up to you, tells you a joke and then, while you are laughing, punches you in the face (sometime laughing while you are bleeding).

Does this make Paisley the next Johnny Cash or the savior of an important genre? No. He is still a conventional country singer, but his subversion of the medium is refreshing. Just like some preachers that are changing the tide and allowing for people to think for themselves or giving a fresh perspective on the Christian faith through story and listening to other voices than what they were taught in seminary, Paisley gives hope to a genre lacking relevance beyond nostalgia. I hope he is only the beginning in a genre I love and I hope his example is followed by preachers, politicians and writers with traditional/ popular voices and pulpits.

For examples, check out these songs:

Welcome to The Future

American Saturday Night

Waiting On a Woman

Expose in St Pete Times on Scientology

Did you catch these articles from the best newspaper in Florida, and one of the best in America, The St. Pete Times regarding the cracks in the armor of Scientology. It is an illuminating set of articles. I wager that it will be nominated for a Pulitzer, if I were a betting man.

Here is the link to the entire series. It is worth reading in its entirety if you have a chance.

Link

Also, here is commentary by The Daily Beast.